I noticed as a young boy that I could turn up the volume on my record player, but I could not turn up the silence when I wanted to be quiet and study my thoughts. I could create more noise, but when my sister was playing her music in the room next door, I could not turn up the sound of silence in my room. That was both puzzling and frustrating to my ten-year-old mind.
When I’m focused on the external world, I create experiences and purchases that I think will bring joy, even though they are short-lived. But focusing on internal joy is not as simple. Like silence, I could not find a way to turn up the joy, and yet I knew it was possible. But how?
I learned that many of my habits inhibited the experience of joy that is constantly within me. Joy did not need to be turned up but given the chance to flow freely. My experience and medical science have confirmed that removing these obstacles to joy changes my body’s physiology for the better: my metabolism, my hormones, and my microbiology all function more efficiently to meet the needs of the moment.
The sacred textbooks and teachers of both modern and ancient times say that uniting the mind and breath reduces my sense’s external infatuation. This creates the opportunity to start pulling them inwards to remove obstacles, explore my mental warehouse, and find what lies deeper within. Spoiler alert: the ancients say that beyond the mind is the source of intuition and unbreakable joy (tranquility), if only I learn to cross the barriers.
It begins with focusing the senses to stay in that intermediate territory between the physical world and the internal world of the mind and intuition. But the surges of my urges kept running out for foods and flavors, pretty things to see and hear, things to touch, ways to move around, and fun ways to interact with others. It took a while to entice my senses to stay in that de-militarized zone that weakens the strength of hurry, curry, and worry.
My de-militarized zone is the semi-porous barrier between my physical body and mind. I use the analogy because of my mind’s militant desire to demand that the world and everyone in it behaves the way I want them to behave. When my mental world unleashes these impulses without my de-militarized zone calming them down, then my body has little choice but to act out these urges and ideologies. Slowly I started to go into this zone that is always available to everyone, but also easily ignored or just simply overlooked.
I first experienced the inner world of sound as mental conversations and replays of popular music. Radio or television commercial jingles that had a rhythm and a rhyme would seem to automatically replay in my head—such as “two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.” Odd that a hamburger commercial was playing in my vegetarian mind.
My inner songs, conversations, and advertisements quieted down as I learned more about how to keep my breath flowing and by noticing an inner sensation of coolness and warmth at tip of my nostrils. Coolness when I would inhale and warmth that I would exhale. The more I noticed these inner nasal sensations, the more the chatter and feelings of restlessness and sluggishness diminished. All that was left was pleasantness, comfort, and a quieting sense of joy.
I started replacing the word ‘joy’ for contentment, peacefulness, and later it became a sturdy strong sense of tranquility. Repetition made these experiences more comforting, soothing, and satisfying. Much more than whatever the external world could bring. And more importantly for me, tranquility brought about a deep sense of trust that healing was happening within me.
I was not intentionally trying to heal a part of my body, nor isolate and focus on some cancer cells, but rather I was realizing that this river of life-supporting energy flows all by itself. There was no need to push the river, nor could I find any method to push it.
I did find it helpful to remove life obstacles and beaver dams — like fear and doubt — that were stopping the river from flowing, as well as foods and beverages that create dullness or excessive restlessness. Exercising to exhaustion created too much muscle mass. Exercise could also cause too much loss of muscle and fat making me feel light, spacey, and unable to focus.
Removing these types of pollutants from the river automatically allowed it to nourish healthier functions of my metabolism, endocrine function, and brain metabolism. This clean flowing river is probably the cause of healing. Thinking of dis-ease as a “lack of ease or comfort” meant that the more ease and tranquility I was experiencing within me, the more healing had to be happening.
As I learned to pierce the de-militarized zone and stay inside it for six to twelve minutes once or twice a day or even once or twice a week, I was led to a state of tranquility and comfort. It was palpable to me that healing was happening in my body and mind without having to go to medical school or study healing encyclopedias.
The discovery of my atrial fibrillation and cancer sent all sorts of external resources that were supposed to heal me knocking on my door. And many of those doors I opened, such as chemotherapy and radiation, but also relaxation and meditation and removing the pollutants from my lifestyle mentally, emotionally, physically, and environmentally. The path I follow is trusting that the inner river knows best what I need and staying equally in touch with modern medical science and all the other 64 arts and sciences of Ayurveda for healing and happiness.
As I’m writing this today, I still don’t know if my body is cancer free. I know that my atrial fibrillation seems to manifest from dehydration and from anxiety and worry. It is still treated with medication, EFT, breathing, and meditation.
I’m dictating this writing today as I’m driving home on Hwy 6 from the hospital after receiving a special injection to boost my white blood cell count. It turned me into a philosopher by the 10th mile marker. I know there is more to unpack and discuss about the sensations, the information, and transmissions that occur from inner light and sound, but I think for this highway adventure, this is a good place to stop for now.
I hope your day goes well and remember that there’s no need to push the river, it flows all by itself. Keeping the rivers clean and free of pollution at all levels might be a way to pass your time for a few minutes throughout your day.
Best Wishes,
OB1